IN THE MERDE FOR LOVE

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In The Merde For Love

Author : Stephen Clarke
ISBN : 159691744X
Genre : Travel
File Size : 53.43 MB
Format : PDF
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The latest episode in Stephen Clarke's almost-true account of his adventures as an expat in France is just as winning as the first. This "anti-Mayle" will have readers chortling over their croissants and café au lait while Paul West struggles to solve the mysteries inherent in life in France. What is the best way to scare a gendarme? Is it really polite to sleep with your boss's mistress? And why are there no public health warnings on French nude beaches? Paul discovers how to judge a French vacationer by the rustiness of his bicycle; opens his English tearoom; and finally understands why Parisian waiters are so cranky. Just in time for spring in Paris, find out if Paul finds the perfect French mademoiselle or if it all ends in merde!
Category: Travel

Merde Happens

Author : Stephen Clarke
ISBN : 9781742748283
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 82.7 MB
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Q: What happens when an Englishman, an American, and a French woman drive across America in a Mini? A: Merde Happens ... Paul West is in deep financial merde. His only way out of debt is to accept a decidedly dodgy job that involves him touring America in a Mini, while pretending to be typically British. Also in the car is Paul's French girlfriend, Alexa, and his American poet friend, Jake, whose main aim in life is to sleep with a woman from every country in the world. Preferably in the back of Paul's Mini. But as the little car battles from New York to Miami, and then heads west, leg-room turns out to be the least of Paul's troubles. His work is being sabotaged, his tour plans are in tatters, and his love life becomes a Franco-American war zone. And as Paul knows better than anyone, when you mix love and war - merde happens ...
Category: Fiction

Talk To The Snail

Author : Stephen Clarke
ISBN : 9781407038728
Genre : Travel
File Size : 85.34 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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Have you been taken to what you've been assured is the perfect house deep in the French countryside, only to find there's no electricity or running water? Gone to the doctor with a nasty cough, and been diagnosed with a rather more personal complaint? Walked into an half-empty restaurant, only to be told that it's complet? If the answer to any of the above is oui, Talk to the Snail is the book for you.Find out how to get served in a restaurant; the best way to deal with French hypochondria; learn the language of love, sex and suppositories (not necessarily in that order); it's all here in this funny, informative, seriously useful guide on how to get what you really want from the French. With advice on essential phrases and bons mots to cover all eventualities, and illustrated with witty real-life anecdotes, Talk to the Snail is a book that no self-respecting Francophile - or Francophobe - can afford to be without. Don't go to France without reading this book. And don't even think of buying a house there.
Category: Travel

A Year In The Merde

Author : Stephen Clarke
ISBN : 1596917466
Genre : Travel
File Size : 63.50 MB
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A Year in the Merde is the almost-true account of the author's adventures as an expat in Paris. Based on his own experiences and with names changed to "avoid embarrassment, possible legal action-and to prevent the author's legs being broken by someone in a Yves Saint Laurent suit", the book is narrated by Paul West, a twenty-seven-year-old Brit who is brought to Paris by a French company to open a chain of British "tea rooms." He must manage of a group of lazy, grumbling French employees, maneuver around a treacherous Parisian boss, while lucking into a succession of lusty girlfriends (one of whom happens to be the boss's morally challenged daughter). He soon becomes immersed in the contradictions of French culture: the French are not all cheese-eating surrender monkeys, though they do eat a lot of smelly cheese, and they are still in shock at being stupid enough to sell Louisiana, thus losing the chance to make French the global language. The book will also tell you how to get the best out of the grumpiest Parisian waiter, how to survive a French business meeting, and how not to buy a house in the French countryside. The author originally wrote A Year in the Merde just for fun and self-published it in France in an English-language edition. Weeks later, it had become a word-of-mouth hit for expats and the French alike. With translation rights now sold in eleven countries and already a bestseller in the UK and France, Stephen Clarke is clearly a Bill Bryson (or a Peter Mayle...) for a whole new generation of readers who can never quite decide whether they love-or love to hate-the French.
Category: Travel

Falling In Love With English Boys

Author : Melissa Jensen
ISBN : 9781101478042
Genre : Young Adult Fiction
File Size : 69.71 MB
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Sixteen-year-old Catherine Vernon has been stranded in London for the summer-no friends, no ex-boyfriend Adam the Scum (good riddance!), and absolutely nothing to do but blog about her misery to her friends back home. Desperate for something-anything-to do in London while her (s)mother's off researching boring historical things, Cat starts reading the 1815 diary of Katherine Percival her mom gives her-and finds the similarities between their lives to be oddly close. But where Katherine has the whirls of the society, the parties and the gossip over who is engaged to who, Cat's only got some really excellent English chocolate. Then she meets William Percival-the uber-hot descendant of Katherine-and things start looking up . . .
Category: Young Adult Fiction

For A Night Of Love

Author : Émile Zola
ISBN : 9781780940892
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 21.58 MB
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In his three short stories, 'For a Night of Love', 'Nantas', and 'Fasting', Emile Zola presents characters in search of fulfilment ? romantic, religious, and financial. Read together, For a Night of Love is an extraordinary depiction of sexual mores. When the apparently angelic Th(r)r se commits murder, she offers sexual favours to a petty clerk if he will dispose of the body; the pregnant Flavie manipulates a neighbour's interest in her dowry to arrange a shotgun wedding; churchgoing women find their hunger for Christianity unsatisfied by a vapid priest ? these beautiful and poignant stories are united by the powerful themes of deception and dissatisfaction. "
Category: Fiction

True Season Of Love

Author : Urenna Sander
ISBN : 9780595601257
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 61.76 MB
Format : PDF
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A medical journalist, renounced by her fianc, Olivia Moreno leaves the States to live in Paris with her sister, Connie. Considered reserved, on a whim, Olivia attends a masked charity ball in London. A masked Olivia escapes her comfort zone, partying and conversing with some of Connies fashionable and exclusive friends. There, Olivia meets Greek maverick, Ptolemy Verenis, a sword designer. Entranced by her liquid brown eyes, peering through an ornate mask, Ptolemy wins his bid for charity for Olivia and Connie to dine with him and a friend. A relationship with a perfect stranger is unlike sensible Olivia. After that night, Olivia wishes to forget what happened in London. She hopes never to see Ptolemy again. But Ptolemy is intent on finding her.
Category: Fiction

Love In The Elephant Tent

Author : Kathleen Cremonesi
ISBN : 9781770907317
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 35.66 MB
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If you live life without a net, what happens when you fall? Kathleen Cremonesi knew early on she wanted to be different. Determined to avoid following in her mother's footsteps to an ill-fated marriage, Kathleen left Oregon in her early 20s to travel across Europe. On a whim, this former administrative assistant with wanderlust took a job as a dancer in a circus and, working her way up, became an ostrich-riding, shark-taming showgirl. Kathleen bonds with the exotic animals that could strike and kill at any moment, but instead bring her a peace she has never known. And when she stumbles into the arms of Stefano, the sexy elephant keeper, she finds a man who understands her wild spirit. With thrilling prose and vivid descriptions, Kathleen takes the reader around the Mediterranean, where she discovers unexpected friends and learns how to cook, forgive, and love - across language barriers.
Category: Biography & Autobiography

Love Bill

Author : Jan Krulick-Belin
ISBN : 9781457547003
Genre : History
File Size : 56.48 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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"There's a bit of everyone's family in this moving and heartwarming journey. I know that Janet has been hungering to write this story her whole life, and I'm happy to report: she done good!" -Paul Reiser, Actor, Author, and Comedian "Seemingly ordinary, yet eloquent love letters sent to a GI's future wife during wartime, proved to be a never-imagined godsend for their yet-to-be-born daughter. Not only did they lead Jan on a quest to bond with the father she lost at a young age, but they offer us a deeper insight into every soldier's struggle amidst the chaos of war to hold on to his dream of returning to the life and loves he left behind. It's a story that captured my heart... a marvelous work." -Captain Louis Matjasko, USN Retired; Executive Director, Circle of Change Veterans Dog Program "Identity and memory are the universal themes that bind human experience and fuel the quest to understand the past from a very personal perspective. Being able to touch actual artifacts that are precious family heirlooms, gives meaning to our very existence as daughters and sons, as witnesses to history, and as human beings. They give us unexpected road maps that reveal not just the greater geographical world around us, but the hidden chambers within our own hearts. A box of letters inspired Krulick-Belin to bravely embark upon this journey of longing. Using her keen curatorial eye and art historian's sleuthing abilities, she discovered the father she barely knew, and in turn, her own place in the world. We are privileged to travel alongside her on this odyssey she so generously shares." -Marissa Roth, Pulitzer Prize winning Photojournalist, Documentary Photographer (One Person Crying: Women and War), and Writer. "Krulick-Belin does an impressive job of placing her father's experiences in North Africa, a theatre of WWII that is little known or understood, in historical perspective. In addition, she helps shine a spotlight on her father's Jewish identity as a U.S. soldier serving in North Africa and the Mediterranean, his contacts with the local Jewish populations, and his desire to enlist in the struggle against Nazi Germany despite his age. An interesting work about a daughter's discovery of both her father as well as her own heritage." -Lawrence Bell, Executive Director, Arizona Jewish Historical Society "Jan researched the history, culture, and religions of North Africa, while looking through a very personal lens to rediscover her father. She tells a compelling story particularly for those interested in the North African campaign of World War II, and those interested in the Moroccan Jewish community." -Robert J. Silverman, U.S. Director of Muslim-Jewish Relations, American Jewish Committee; Former Senior Foreign Service Officer, U.S. Department of State
Category: History

What We Love

Author : J. A. Jones
ISBN : 9781304545039
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 32.44 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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Jacob Miller, a painter confined to a wheel chair most of his life as a result of childhood polio, is confronted with whether to end his friend's life when that friend is lying unable to move a muscle after breaking his neck. What We Love, takes us on a voyage through eight years in Jacob's life from a poor artist living with his to-be wife in SoHo to ultimate worldwide success. During the course of his development his sole pursuit is getting at the truth in everything he paints. Yet near the end of the story he tells the world and his wife a lie that only she can uncover.
Category: Fiction