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Giraffes Ruin Everything

Author : Heidi Schulz
ISBN : 9781681190839
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 65.57 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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In this mischievously funny picture book, friends come in all shapes and sizes. In case you were wondering, here's an incomplete list of things giraffes ruin: - Birthday parties - Going to the movies - Playing at the park - Hide and Seek - Everything else Yes, that's right. Giraffes ruin everything. But what happens when our narrator gets into a tricky situation? Perhaps he'll find giraffes aren't so bad after all . . .
Category: Juvenile Fiction

Giraffe People

Author : Jill Malone
ISBN : 9781612940403
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 76.84 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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Lambda Literary Award winner Jill Malone delivers a fresh and subtle take on the coming out story.
Category: Fiction

2015 Children S Writer S Illustrator S Market

Author : Chuck Sambuchino
ISBN : 9781599638669
Genre : Reference
File Size : 32.9 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
Download : 541
Read : 562

The most trusted guide to the world of children's publishing! If you write or illustrate for young readers with the hope of getting published, the 2015 Children's Writer's & Illustrator's Market is the trusted resource you need. Now in its 27th edition, CWIM is the definitive publishing guide for anyone who seeks to write or illustrate for kids and young adults. Inside you'll find more than 500 listings for children's book markets (publishers, agents, magazines, and more)--including a point of contact, how to properly submit your work, and what categories each market accepts. You'll also find: • Interviews with creators of today's successful children's books, including James Dashner (The Maze Runner series), Lauren DeStefano (Wither series), and illustrator Loren Long (Of Thee I Sing with Barack Obama) • Success stories and advice from 13 debut authors and 9 debut illustrators • Informative articles on how to write for boys and other "reluctant readers," how to write and sell children's nonfiction, how to sell your picture book, the difference between young adult and middle-grade, and much more *Includes access to the webinar "Be Your Own Editor: Tips for Self-Editing Your Children's Book" from editor Harold Underdown* This 60-minute webinar shows how to take your work and transform it into something great that will get editors, agents and readers excited. It's taught by Harold Underdown, who is both the editor of the popular kidlit website, The Purple Crayon, and the author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Publishing Children's Books. The truth is that getting a first draft completed is just the beginning for any writer. You've got to refine, revise, polish and overhaul your writing to make it the finest final product it can be -- and that's exactly what this webinar will teach you how to do.
Category: Reference

The Mating Rituals Of The Burning Giraffe

Author : Morgan Benson
ISBN : 9781450042925
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 41.41 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Set in a world where clocks melt and gentlemen rain from the sky, The Mating Rituals Of The Burning Giraffe is a grown-ups fable, inspired by the surrealist paintings, sculptures, and sketches of Magritte, Dal, and Monty Python. Its a brightly colored delirium, dedicated to the indomitable child. The story follows Billy Dada, a young man about to enter a state of higher learning where he will be taught the principles of categorizing biological diversity, from smelly wolves to cats with heads like mushrooms, from hares with fangs to enormous clams, but who, midst the books and lectures, nurtures a fascination with the giraffa infernalis, a pyring obsession thats about to turn into a scathefire. So begins a black-and-blue excursion into the brushstrokes on lifes canvas. Its a slab of confusion and desperation, a swirl of hardships and sorrowsinside a frame of meaning. The Mating Rituals of the Burning Giraffe is an adult fairytale about how fate tears us apart unless we move with it. Its a way to move with it. Move with it.
Category: Fiction

To Catch A Giraffe

Author : Graeme Tollins
ISBN : 1514379465
Genre :
File Size : 81.9 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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Read : 321

Danny owes three grand to a local gangster. He has exactly seventeen pounds, twenty-two pence in his building society account. This, he realises, is a problem. When he is offered a simple three-way choice: Pay up, lose his testicles, or steal a baby giraffe from the zoo, Danny plumps for option c. He has five days to deliver. With the help of his best friend, Raymond, an obsessive-compulsive with an IQ of 160, Danny puts together an extraordinary plan. One that might just keep his balls out of a metalwork vice, and his life savings behind the vault doors. Meanwhile, on the rich side of town, virginal Huey and his friends are preparing for prom night. His cougar mother has paid for the limo. Controversial rapper, MC Byatch Forker, is to be the star attraction. For Huey though, the last day of school is all about Susanna Harriot, the girl responsible for his huge tissue bill. Can he make her see how amazing he really is, or will the three blonde witches from the tennis club ruin everything once again? Helped and hindered in equal measure by; Marco, a tourettes afflicted pizza delivery boy; Elmore, a gangster thug in a yellow leather jacket; Constance, a gentle zoo security officer, and; SO19, the specialist armed police unit. Then there is a baby giraffe called Flo. Along with a large cast of miscreants, misanthropes, MILFs, murderers, and mal-adjusted sisters who play viola, Danny and Raymond plot their giraffe kidnap, a plan as daring as the 'Dambusters' raid itself, hoping against all odds that they can save Danny's balls from unwanted compression. Prom night is going to be epic. WARNING - This is NOT a children's book. Contains strong language and politically incorrect humour.

The Short Giraffe

Author : Neil Flory
ISBN : 1489638857
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 55.77 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Read : 1091

When baboon comes to take a photo of the tallest animals in the world, there is just one small problem-- Geri is the shortest giraffe in the world!.
Category: Juvenile Fiction

Robbi Regt Sich Auf

Author : Mireille d' Allancé
ISBN : 3895651915
Genre : Anger
File Size : 62.42 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Category: Anger

Neck Neck

Author : Elise Parsley
ISBN : 9780316466752
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 63.44 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
Download : 803
Read : 786

In this crowd-pleasing read-aloud from the creator of the bestselling If You Ever Want to Bring an Alligator to School, Don't!, a giraffe's self-esteem is tested during a hilarious confrontation between unlikely look-alikes! Everybody loves Leopold the giraffe. He inspires awe and wonder. His adoring fans gaze and cheer. Best of all, they feed him lots of deeeelicious snacks! But, one day, a shiny, bobble-headed new rival comes in and ruins everything...a giraffe-shaped balloon! Just how far will Leopold go to prove that he's the hero of the zoo? Readers learn that actions speak far louder than looks in this laugh-out-loud face-off from Elise Parsley--the New York Times bestselling creator of the Magnolia Says DON'T! series.
Category: Juvenile Fiction

Where Do Pants Go

Author : Rebecca Van Slyke
ISBN : 1454915927
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 47.19 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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Read : 840

"Where do pants go? Do they go on your head? No! "This humorous story shows kids how to put on their clothes, from the underwear on their bottoms to the hats on their heads. But sometimes getting dressed doesn t happen without a few fun missteps! These adorable toddlers and their dogs are sure to tickle the funny bone of every young reader."
Category: Juvenile Fiction