CLOSE TO HOME ATTACK OF THE 70 FOOT ZOMBIE TODDLERS A BOOK OF PARENTING CARTOONS

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Women Are From Venus Men Are Idiots

Author : John McPherson
ISBN : 9781449406202
Genre : Humor
File Size : 54.84 MB
Format : PDF
Download : 452
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Inside Women Are from Venus, Men Are Idiots, Close to Home cartoonist John McPherson illustrates what happens when planets--and planetary beings--just don't seem to align. From memorable Thanksgiving TV-carving dinners to disjointed marriage counseling sessions, McPherson culls more than 75 relationship-specific, full-color panels inside this interplanetary ode to coupledom. McPherson's mastery in Close to Home is elevating the mundane to the magnificent. The caustic interactions between balding, bespeckled middle-aged men and auburn-haired, beehive-tressed women become achingly funny when sketched by his pen. Appearing in more than 700 newspapers internationally, McPherson's Close to Home is one of the most popular card lines from Recycled Paper Greetings.
Category: Humor

When Bad Things Happen To Stupid People

Author : John McPherson
ISBN : 9780740793097
Genre : Humor
File Size : 35.50 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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Some call it weird. Others, eclectic, creative, hilarious, laugh-out-loud funny, and good old-fashioned snort-milk-out-your-nose humor. Whatever adjective you apply to Close to Home, it has become one of the most popular comic panels in the funny pages today. Close to Home has devout fans that range from elementary students to octogenarians. As one fan put it, "I feel like you have been looking in my window and are drawing my life!" Though by no means a Peeping Tom, John McPherson does have the unique skill of being able to take those idiosyncrasies of daily life that drive us all nuts and infuse them with razor-sharp wit. In When Bad Things Happen to Stupid People John features angry letters from readers, cartoons that were killed by the editor, a glimpse inside his creative process, and never-before-seen photos of his erasers, quill pens, and his lucky drawing slippers. Who could resist it?
Category: Humor

Close To Home Mcpherson On Sports

Author : John McPherson
ISBN : 9781449439859
Genre : Humor
File Size : 35.98 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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Sports is one of cartoonist John McPherson's favorite topics for lampooning. The frustration inherent in almost any sport makes for a perfect comic target. What's funnier than a flummoxed fisherman, a goaded golfer, a bamboozled batter, or a fumbling football player? Find out in this collection of John's favorites. Close to Home debuted in 50 newspapers in 1992 after McPherson left his engineering job to become a full-time cartoonist, and today the comic strip runs in nearly 700 newspapers worldwide. His characters are regularly confronted with everyday dilemmas and their responses are always cleverly unpredictable. The situations are somehow both outlandish yet relatable, and anyone is sure to burst out in laughter at this original e-book collection of all of Close to Home’s boldest and best comical takes on sports.
Category: Humor

The Girl With All The Gifts

Author : M. R. Carey
ISBN : 9780316278140
Genre : Fiction
File Size : 75.96 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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The USA Today bestseller Melanie is a very special girl. Dr Caldwell calls her "our little genius." Every morning, Melanie waits in her cell to be collected for class. When they come for her, Sergeant keeps his gun pointing at her while two of his people strap her into the wheelchair. She thinks they don't like her. She jokes that she won't bite, but they don't laugh. The Girl With All the Gifts is a groundbreaking thriller, emotionally charged and gripping from beginning to end.
Category: Fiction

A Million Little Pieces Of Close To Home

Author : John McPherson
ISBN : 0740761986
Genre : Humor
File Size : 61.22 MB
Format : PDF
Download : 679
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Is your face suffering from a lack of exercise? Readers rely on John McPherson'sClose to Homecartoon to contort their facial muscles into an unstoppable grin each day. Not even Botox can stop you from smiling at this latest collection ofClose to Home. How do you measure a cartoon's popularity? The true measure of a comic panel's popularity is how often it is posted on a refrigerator, cubicle, break room bulletin board, or office door. By that standard,Close to Homewins the comic panel popularity contest hands down. Close to Homecaptures the humor in all facets of life. From home to hospitals, from classrooms to courtrooms, from boardrooms to backyards-there's aClose to Homepanel that hits us where we live and work and play. A Million Little PiecesofClose to Homefeatures hilarious panels first published in newspapers in the year 2000, the year of the Y2K scare that never materialized. Of course, that's just the kind of thing you'd expect from aClose to Homeworld.
Category: Humor

Everything I Need To Know I Learned On Jerry Springer

Author : John McPherson
ISBN : 9780740793233
Genre : Humor
File Size : 46.66 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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Where there is stress, there is humor." --John McPherson * Close to Home, syndicated by Universal uClick, lampoons the best of popular culture one controversy at a time. Everything I Need to Know I Learned on Jerry Springer: A Close to Home Collection is a Close to Home collection. Creator John McPherson's sardonic wit creates an innocent hullabaloo with the Center for Nursing Advocacy and earns the accolades of Leavenworth Federal Detention Center's inmate #19108045. * McPherson's mastery is elevating the mundane to the magnificent. Scenes of societal sloth, coworker conundrums, dysfunctional discord, and medical malpractice become achingly funny when sketched by his pen.
Category: Humor

I Am Legend

Author : Richard Matheson
ISBN :
Genre :
File Size : 90.30 MB
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Robert Neville has witnessed the end of the world. The entire population has been obliterated by a vampire virus. Somehow, Neville survived. He must now struggle to make sense of everything that has happened and learn to protect himself against the vampires who hunt him constantly. He must, because perhaps there is nothing else human left. I Am Legend was a major influence in horror and brought a whole new thematic concept to apocalyptic literature. Several humanistic and emotional themes in this book blend the horror genre with traditional fiction: we see Neville as an emotional person, and observe as he suffers bouts of depression, dips into alcoholism and picks up his strength again to fight the vampiric bacteria that has infected (and killed off) most of humankind. Neville soon meets a woman, Ruth, (after three years alone), who seems to be uninfected and a lone survivor. The two become close and he learns from Ruth that the infected have learned to fight the disease...
Category:

The Toddler Survival Guide

Author : Mike Spohr
ISBN : 9780760352199
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 77.36 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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"The Toddler Survival Guide is a hilarious parody that will leave parents laughing even as it provides practical advise on how they can make it through toddlerhood intact"--
Category: Family & Relationships

Septic Zombie A Short Story Written By A Seven Year Old Home Schooled Girl

Author : Aquila Robinson
ISBN : 0984042369
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 65.58 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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When Aquila Robinson and her friend Naomi find a magical ring at the bottom of a stony creek, strange thing begin to happen. The sound of shuffling feet emerges from the woods, followed closely by a low moaning, "brraaaiiinnsss," that sends the girls running and begins an adventure that could only come from the mind of a seven year old author. SEPTIC ZOMBIE is the first story written by homeschooled seven year old, Aquila Robinson (the real Aquila). With the help of her father (bestselling author Jeremy Robinson), Aquila has written, art directed, formatted and released this book, which she dictated to her father. Every word is hers, though she did work with an editor (mostly to fix Dad's typos). She even contacted the authors below and asked them to read the book-those are real endorsements! Speaking of which: "Zombies, magic rings, UFOs, and aliens...Aquila Robinson's story SEPTIC ZOMBIE is something I would have written, if I'd been as brave as a seven-year-old girl. A story for the ages...for all the ages!" --James Rollins, NY Times Bestselling Author of THE DEVIL COLONY "I LOVE this! Aquila is a fierce talent with a wildly inventive mind. She is going to push her father and me out of the book business one of these days." - Jonathan Maberry, NY Times Bestselling author of ASSASSIN'S CODE and DUST & DECAY
Category: Juvenile Fiction

Miss Peregrine S Home For Peculiar Children

Author : Ransom Riggs
ISBN : 9781594745133
Genre : Young Adult Fiction
File Size : 34.39 MB
Format : PDF
Download : 197
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The #1 New York Times Best Seller is now a major motion picture from visionary director Tim Burton, starring Eva Green, Asa Butterfield, Ella Purnell, Samuel L. Jackson, and Judi Dench. Bonus features • Q&A with author Ransom Riggs • Eight pages of color stills from the film • Sneak preview of Hollow City, the next novel in the series A mysterious island. An abandoned orphanage. A strange collection of very curious photographs. It all waits to be discovered in Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children, an unforgettable novel that mixes fiction and photography in a thrilling reading experience. As our story opens, a horrific family tragedy sets sixteen-year-old Jacob journeying to a remote island off the coast of Wales, where he discovers the crumbling ruins of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children. As Jacob explores its abandoned bedrooms and hallways, it becomes clear that the children were more than just peculiar. They may have been dangerous. They may have been quarantined on a deserted island for good reason. And somehow—impossible though it seems—they may still be alive. A spine-tingling fantasy illustrated with haunting vintage photography, Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children will delight adults, teens, and anyone who relishes an adventure in the shadows. “A tense, moving, and wondrously strange first novel. The photographs and text work together brilliantly to create an unforgettable story.”—John Green, New York Times best-selling author of The Fault in Our Stars “With its X-Men: First Class-meets-time-travel story line, David Lynchian imagery, and rich, eerie detail, it’s no wonder Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children has been snapped up by Twentieth Century Fox. B+”—Entertainment Weekly “‘Peculiar’ doesn’t even begin to cover it. Riggs’ chilling, wondrous novel is already headed to the movies.”—People “You’ll love it if you want a good thriller for the summer. It’s a mystery, and you’ll race to solve it before Jacob figures it out for himself.”—Seventeen
Category: Young Adult Fiction